Bestman Speech – A Nerve-racking Honor
Apr 6th, 2009
It has been joked that serving as the bestman at your friend’s wedding is a little bit like being asked to dance with the Queen Mother. While it is an undeniable honor, it is also something most people would rather not do. One of the main reasons for this sentiment is the duty of giving the bestman speech that comes along with the privilege.
Unless you are accustomed to frequently standing up in front of a large crowd and speaking, the bestman speech can be a nerve-racking task for even the most stout of heart and fearless of friends. During the wedding reception, the attention and the pressure turns to the bestman to say some memorable words about the bride and groom. The speech should be sincere, heartfelt and entertaining all at the same time, but for many men, it is a task that brings sweat to their brow and makes their mouth as dry as a desert.
There is no doubt that the bestman feels responsible for expressing just the right sentiments in the bestman speech. It is fortunate that a good wedding speech can be done rather easily by following some simple tips and ground rules.
Writing the bestman speech will require some focused time, a fair amount of patience, some creativity and some hard work. If someone thought highly enough of you to ask you to do the honors of serving as their bestman, then you should know that you are on the right track. Focus on the relationship that you have with the couple and the good times that you have enjoyed together. Soon, you will have the foundation for some wonderful words about them that you can share with friends and family.
Some of the things that will help you formulate your bestman speech are the following: your relationship with them and the reasons they chose you as the bestman, basic and simple descriptions of them and their personalities, five positive adjectives for each of them, what the groom was like before meeting his bride and how he has changed in the course of their courtship, how they met and how their relationship developed, marital advice you feel qualified to share and any amusing stories or anecdotes that you know about them that will help others at the wedding gain insights about them as a couple.
You will also find additional helpful resources online to assist in the writing of a wedding speech or wedding toast. There are many sites that give examples of wedding speeches and toasts that can be used to spark ideas or even a basic outline. If the couple has chosen a specific wedding theme, then the theme can also be useful in adding special elements to the speech that help illustrate the couple’s personality and taste.
It is important to remember that while a bestman speech can include humor to help to change the tone of the wedding from formal to celebratory, the humor must be appropriate and elevating. As long as the comments made during the speech are from the heart and done with affection, even the worst case of nerves can become unimportant.